I feel inclined to agree, I think I got excited about the ideas, and went a bit too quickly, thanks for reading.

The story is designed to have a very light hearted feel, I really enjoy starting stories in the middle and working backwards I feel it is more dramatic. As for spelling and grammer mistakes, I'm not always my own best editor. thanks for reading and for the advice.

I like this alot so far, you did a nice job of building the suspense!

Thank you! I am having alot of fun with this!

Thank you! I think it will be fun to see where it goes. :)