Thanks for commenting. Usually, I don't do run on sentences, but I thought I could get away with it this time, with semi-colons. I may need to review my punctuation. Also, unusual for me, is I kept it in the present tense throughout the story, to make the action seem ongoing, but even in that case, there is a beginning, middle and end, and I can't "freeze time". I guess with Storymash, each chapter is open to different interpretations, but what I meant with regards to my character is that her mission is to reconnect with her father for whatever reasons someone might want to reunite with a longlost relative--curiosity, loneliness, wanting a feeling of connection, and last, but certainly not least, concern--nothing more unique than those. I wouldn't say her mother thinks she's "crazy", but the idea I had in mind was that her mother, like many mothers who are no longer involved with the father of the child or children thinks the father is a person with nothing to offer, especially if the mother knew of or saw signs of the potential for severe alcoholism. Of course Storymash authors can take
a story in any direction they like, but my idea was that future chapters would explore their reactions to each other after reconnecting after many years, and the impact they have on each other's lives, if any. I hope I clarified, and I hope I can rewrite, taking all the grammatical and punctuation "bugs" out!!

Thanks for writing, but I wouldn't call it "exact" (if you mean word-for-word) Did you read my preview??? However, I do feel at this point, it doesn't tie the chapters in that well.

Thank you for responding. The idea for this chapter came to me in the middle of a day filled with stressful events, but I submitted it on that day, anyway, so that might have affected my writing style. (Maybe, an idea for another story. Maybe stress really can stimulate creativity. ; ) ) Anyway, when I had more leisure, and I was more relaxed, I reviewed what I had submitted, and realized that if one word had been different, perhaps everyone would have gotten what I was trying to say. Thanks for the encouragement, as well. I feel like submitting the chapter again with a few words revised, just to see what people's reaction would be, but if expansion is still wanted, I definitely have some ideas for that, too!!

Is there a limit to the number of versions of the next chapter you can submit per round?

Or committing other acts of vengeance.

She was raped, like in her dream because she was committing adultery or at least her husband was suspecting her of doing so. The church receives generous donations for killing off those who irk the donors.

Thanks for commenting. I meant for Ryan Davis to be the ex, (or maybe soon-to-be ex). The "church" neither knows nor cares about anyone else's abilities. They believe themselves to be the most powerful.
As for elaboration, I wanted to leave that wide open for other writers!!!

The above sounds like a great idea, but the idea of a story going off in a who-knows-how-long direction also sounds good too!!

Well, it's been fun, either way.

I think the idea about continuing the 85 4.0 or higher chapters is great, but those of us who wrote chapters with lower ratings which were not continued, or are not encouraged to be continued may start to feel like chopped liver!!!

I would like to add this on to the "One Liners",
if possible. Thanks